


Do Not Disturb

by widerussianeyes



Category: The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, M/M, Texting, literally just a gay mess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-16
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-07-05 00:06:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15852207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/widerussianeyes/pseuds/widerussianeyes
Summary: frodo: do sheep get static cling when they rub against each other?sam: jesus christmerry: frodo i s2garagorn: i am officially Done With Your Shit(Or: the modern groupchat AU no one asked for but got anyway)





	1. Chapter 1

_aragorn added arwen, frodo, sam, pippin, merry, gimli, boromir, eowyn, and diamond to the group_

_aragorn named the groupchat “hell hoes”_

aragorn: what the fuck is up kyle

 

merry: hI FRANDZ

 

pippin: BFFFFFFFFSSS

 

frodo: hiiiiiiiiii

 

gimli: this gc is back yipee

 

aragorn: gimli we are only friends because you say things like yipee

 

gimli: aragorn the only reason that we are friends is because you are mean

 

arwen: children settle down

 

boromir: yo guys what did I miss

 

gimli: not much just aragorn being a MEANIE

 

eowyn: tea

 

pippin: guys help diamond is asleep on my arm and it's rlly cute but my arm is numb and I have to pee

 

frodo: now he must choose: career or girlfriend??

 

pippin: you know sometimes you think ur funny

pippin: but ur not

 

eowyn: i thought that was funny 

 

aragorn: ^

 

gimli: ^^

 

merry: ^^^

 

boromir: ^^^^

 

pippin: okay we get it stop with your arrows

 

pippin: guys hellllppppp meeee pls

 

merry: I suggest you just pull your arm out hella fast like chandler in that one episode of friends

 

arwen: yea no that's a terrible idea

 

sam: can't you just move her?

 

pippin: I could but it's so f ing cute 

 

eowyn: so take a pic so u can remember it foreverz 

 

sam: ooh good idea

 

eowyn: thank you thank you

 

eowyn: I'll be signing autographs at the door

 

aragorn: summer down little miss big shot

 

eowyn: ,,,,,,,,,,the audacity

 

eowyn: boromir, get ur bf

 

pippin: ya uglies are ruining the MoMeNt

 

pippin: k ill do that thanks

 

pippin: ok i took the pic

 

merry: lemme see

 

pippin: attachment - 1 image

 

arwen: awwwwwww

 

eowyn: i just decided she’s the cutest out of all of us sry frodo

 

sam: omg she’s like a little pupper

 

arwen: wow i’m dating the wrong squad member

 

eowyn: ummmmmm

 

arwen: jk ily eowyn

 

eowyn: eh

 

frodo: eowyn say you love her before my otp breaks up and i’ll never believe in love again

 

eowyn: fine, i love you arwen

 

frodo: THANK YOU

 

arwen: wow frodo

 

sam: you won’t be able to believe in love anymore

 

sam: oh really

 

frodo: damn :// ily

 

sam: hm ok

 

pippin: SHIT GUYS I WOKE UP DIAMOND

 

gimli: wtf how

 

eowyn: wHAT HAVE YOU DONE??

 

merry: THIS IS NOT GOOD

 

pippin: I KNOW

 

pippin: I DROPPED A POt

 

pippin: heh pot

 

merry: heh pot

 

sam: WHAT IS SHE DOING

 

pippin: she hasn’t yelled at me yet so that’s good

 

frodo: that’s a good sign

 

pippin: nvm

 

pippin: she checked her phone and saw the picture i took of her sleeping

 

diamond: i have arrived

 

merry: DIAMOND HI

 

diamond: hi merry

 

pippin: hi babe

 

diamond: fuck off

 

aragorn: yall can fight in the dms but this gc is for happiness only

 

merry: ^

 

frodo: i have a question

 

arwen: what

 

sam: whats up

 

merry: yeah?

 

boromir: what is it

 

gimli: ask away

 

frodo: do sheep get static cling when they rub against each other?

 

sam: jesus christ

 

merry: frodo i s2g

 

aragorn: i am officially Done With Your Shit

 

gimli: do they tho

 

pippin: omg

 

pippin: i just

 

frodo: if you had x-ray vision and you closed your eyes, could you still see?

 

diamond: s t o p

 

eowyn: it’s Time To Stop

 

arwen: kys

 

gimli: bitch what the fuck

 

boromir: cryign

 

frodo: why is it called the world series if baseball is only played in the usa and canada

 

pippin: omfg

 

merry: shit

 

frodo: how do you throw away a trash can?

 

merry: idk put you in a dumpster ??

 

eowyn: roASTED

gimli: omG

 

pippin: AAAAAAAAAAAA

 

diamond: u just got draggedt

 

arwen: sHIT FUCKITY FUCK DEJBF

 

sam: i can confirm that that is in fact the answer to the question

 

pippin: i made diamond a grilled cheese and she doesn’t hate me anymore

 

eowyn: yay happy couple

 

diamond: i’m still pissed

 

diamond: i was having a dream that i was in a room with a bunch of puppies climbing all over me and licking my face and pip RUINED IT

 

boromir: omfg that sounds like heaven

 

diamond: it wAS

 

pippin: love i told you i’m sorry it will never happen again

 

diamond: it better not

 

eowyn: …...damn

 

gimli: moving swiftly on,

 

arwen: hey aragorn remember when we were fuckbuddys

 

aragorn: why

 

aragorn: just why

 

arwen: sorry just trying to change the subject

 

aragorn: still tho

 

sam: ^now there are images in my mind

 

diamond: LMAOOOOooooooo

 

diamond: pip is sexually assaulting me

 

eowyn: no means no pippin

 

frodo: oh my

 

sam: pippin omg

 

gimli: pippin thats a crime

 

merry: pippin diamond is a v nice girl

 

arwen: do not hurt her like this

 

pippin: i was just reaching over her to get my water smh

 

frodo: di are you for real rn

 

diamond: lolol

 

diamond: pippin can we do The Thing now ;)))

 

merry: sinners

 

aragorn: how dare you disrespect jesus like this

 

pippin: i am jesus and i approve of this

 

boromir: brb bathing in holy water

 

gimli: ^

 

frodo: ya nasty

 

gimli: i have a story to tell yall

 

arwen: yay your stories are always gr8

 

merry: actually they’re gr9

 

gimli: okay SO i went to target like fifteen min ago bc i realized i was out of bread so i went to target and got bread and as i was leaving i realized that petsmart was having one of those adopt a kitten thing that they do on the weekends…..

 

arwen: you did not

 

gimli: attachment: 1 image

 

gimli: i did

 

gimli: his name is axe

 

eowyn: oh my god i’m in love

 

arwen: ahhhhhh so cute<33333

 

frodo: OMFGAJSAIJS

 

sam: CUTIEW

 

merry: WHAT A SMOL LIL BBEAN

 

aragorn: IS HE FLUFFY

 

gimli: v fluffy

 

aragorn: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

aragorn: brb omw to your house to see axe

 

eowyn: wanna piCK ME UP ON UR WAY

 

sam: oh my goodness he is one of the cutest things i have ever seen

 

frodo: omggggggggg

 

boromir: aragorn wasn’t kidding he’s literally on her way and i’m coming with him

 

eowyn: pICK ME UP ON THE WAY??

 

boromir: lol sure e

 

frodo: well if you guys are going i wanna go too

 

sam: frodo and i are coming too

 

gimli: lit

 

pippin: lol we’re back

 

diamond: hi guys

 

merry: shut up you guys were too busy ~~~~ SINNING~~~~ so now we’re snuggling a kitty

 

diamond: wait what cat

 

aragorn: read the damn messages

 

pippin: wE aRe On OuR wAy

 

gimli: thought so

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Aragorn and Boromir get sentimental and Sam writes a haiku about Frodo...

diamond: pip and i made a list of 5 celebrities we’re allowed to sleep with if the opportunity presents itself like on friends

frodo: wow

merry: who’s on yours

diamond:  
1) Liv Tyler  
2) Lupita Nyong’o  
3) Lea Salonga  
4) Jennifer Aniston  
5) Brendon Urie

eowyn: damn thats a good one

frodo: its v lit

sam: the only one I agree with is brendon urie

diamond: thats because he’s the only guy and you’re gay af

sam: true

merry: who’s on pip’s list

pippin: hang on

pippin: 1) Zayn Malik  
2) Adam Driver  
3) Elijah Wood  
4) Ryan Reynolds  
5) Zac Efron

aragorn: that list is way better

frodo: who tf is elijah wood?

pippin: he was in flipper n happy feet n other shit

sam: I JUST LOOKED HIM UP IM SCREECHINH

eowyn: what a national treasure

sam: HES SMOKIN

sam: AAAAAAAAAAAAA

frodo: eh he’s ok

pippin: come on frodo you’re just salty because your bf thinks he’s hotter than you

frodo: STFU HE DOES NOT

frodo: sam you dont right

sam: ofc not

sam: i totally do lmao

frodo: you do realize i’m in this gc

sam: ofc i do

arwen: e why do we not have these lists

eowyn: idk but we need them tho

arwen: yesyesyes

eowyn: i’ll make mine later im not feeling it rn

sam: i’m making one too

sam: and i think we all know who will be at the top of mine ;)

frodo: stfu about that hoe

sam: what did you say about my new boyfriend

gimli: don’t fight guysss

frodo: yeah sammy don’t fight

sam: fight me

frodo: oh my

aragorn: this guys is really hot tho frodo

frodo: no he looks like a wet rat

merry: sam just tell him you’re sorry bc we all know you think frodo is way hotter than this eli woods guy and you’re both being little dramatic assholes

sam: wow

sam: merry you see right through me

frodo: YAY

frodo: i guess he’s pretty cute

sam: he really is

eowyn: alrighty well now that that’s over

sam: i wonder what his favorite color is

frodo: mine is green

sam: did i ask

pippin: guys stop it

pippin: i hate it when my parents fight :\\\\\

merry: yeah how can you guys fight with your child in this gc

sam: we do not have a child

frodo: we agreed to name him jesse

aragorn: wow thats a stupid name

aragorn: babe back me up

boromir: thats stupid

boromir: we’re naming our son stewart

frodo: STEWART??

eowyn: who names their kid Stewart

arwen: that kid will get made fun of at school with a name like that

gimli: ^

boromir: guys stop being mean to poor stewy :(

frodo: im gonna yELL

pippin: that’s horrrible pls stop

merry: #stoparamir2017

aragorn: wtf is a aramir

merry: it’s your ship name

boromir: the fuck

boromir: who decided this

frodo: literally all of us

arwen: yeah we had a gc when we had to get you two together

eowyn: ugh this sounds lit i wish i was a part of this squad when you did that

aragorn: i was not aware of this

merry: we had to bc you two fuckers were too blind to see that you were madly in love with each other

pippin: yeah it was really bad

pippin: omg boromir remember that sleepover

boromir: pIpPiN DO NOt

aragorn: hmmm what sleepover

boromir: pip pls

gimli: tell us pippin

eowyn: ^

arwen: ^^

Sam: ^^^

frodo: ^^^^

merry: ^^^^^

pippin: gather round kids it’s storytime !1

eowyn: yay

boromir: omg killing myslef

merry: omg don’t kill yourslef

pippin: lol way back before they were dating and they were just roommates that were secretly in love with each other, boromir slept at my apartment one night. so it was like around 2 am and we were watching some movie on netflix and hitting a bong and i got a snapchat from aragorn and so i showed it to him and boromir literally went on a fifteen minute long rant about how cute aragorn was and all the things he does that are just so wonderful and how soft his hair is and by the end there were tears streaming down his face and then it got supes emo bc he told me he was afraid that aragorn was so in love with arwen and he would never get to tell him how he feels about him so i made him tea and we watched gossip girl until he fell asleep at like 4

aragorn: AWW BABE

aragorn: that is the cutest thing i’ve ever heard

merry: omg otp

frodo: yall are so adorbs and gay

sam: awwww

eowyn: omg love <333333

arwen: yo im crying in the club yall cute or whateva

boromir: i’m cringing

boromir: aragorn just climbed on top of me and is now hugging my rly rly tight

pippin: aw

gimli: does anyone know where i can get my cat groomed

eowyn: hey gim

gimli: wat

eowyn: there’s this thing idk if you’ve heard of it

eowyn: but it’s called google and it’s pretty handy

gimli: stfu

arwen: babe u savage

pippin: that was funny

frodo: lmaoooo

sam: guys i have news

arwen: ooh what is it

sam: i’m rly gay

diamond: wtf this is not news

sam: yeah but like

sam: for frodo specifically

sam: and so you know how when i was a kid i loved haikus

merry: oh no

pippin: don’t tell me

aragorn: you didn’t

sam: i did

frodo: he wrote a haiku about my fucking dick

merry: OHMYGOD

arwen: STOP

eowyn: im T R I G G E R E D

boromir: i’m done

boromir: i’m out

boromir: i’m dead and gone

pippin: deceased

diamond: goodbye world

sam: wanna hear it

arwen: NO

diamond: yeah sure

eowyn: di wtf

diamond: what i’ve always wondered what frodo’s dick looks like

sam: attachment: 1 image

arwen: AH

eowyn: whyyy

diamond: nice

gimli: it’s time to S T O P

aragorn: this is why I hate life

sam: you're welcome

gimli: kys

sam: lmao okay

frodo: WHAT NO

frodo: yOU CANY

sam: i’m kiddy kidding

sam: ily too much to kms

frodo: love u babycakes

gimli: GAY

eowyn: gimli when was the last time you had a girlfriend?

gimli: ,,,,,,

gimli: umm

gimli: kindergarten??

diamond: case closed

arwen: ###expost

diamond: for real tho i waannaa hear the haiku

merry: pls no

arwen: ohymmdwe

sam: okay here goes

sam: frodo’s dick  
so beautiful, long, and nice  
stick it in my ass

diamond: not bad

eowyn: currently contemplating suicide

arwen: im yodeling

merry: he’s not wrong tho

merry: i’ve seen it and that’s a pretty accurate description

sam: wait how many people in this gc have actually seen frodo’s dick

merry: me

eowyn: moi

pippin: it was an experiment

boromir: ^ same here

aragorn: multiple times

arwen: mi

gimli: meee

diamond: i feel left out

diamond: he saw my boob once tho

sam: wtf why

diamond: well i slept at his apartment and i was making breakfast the next day and i wasn’t wearing a bra bc they’re uncomfortable to sleep in

frodo: omg i remember this traumatic experience

diamond: stfu i have excellent breasts

diamond: anyway

diamond: i was wearing a loose shirt and so i was reaching up to get something out of the cabinet and i lifted my hand up to get something and my shirt kinda came up with it,,,,,

eowyn: oh my

frodo: i’ll give her this they were v nice

diamond: you’re damn right they are

sam: pls stop

merry: poor sammy is so gay

arwen: HA

arwen: technically you have seen his dick bc sam sent the picture of it

diamond: tru

frodo: wow all of my closest friends have seen my penis

frodo: nice!11!!!1!!!!11

frodo: goals amiright

sam: this is not okay

frodo: i love u bby

sam: i love u too manwhore

frodo: lol<333


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pippin starts to question things and the Fellowship watches a movie...

gimli: live laugh eat chips if u know you’ll never find love :)

diamond: aw gimmy

frodo: guys we needa find gimli a boi toi

sam: ^

merry: everyone text all ur man friends

arwen: uno problemo

arwen: you guys are legit my only friends

diamond: ^

frodo: same lolol

aragorn: well this is a problem

boromir: i’ll post on my twitter about it

aragorn: yes be like ‘psa: my fren needs a boyfren so hmu’

boromir: good idea

pippin: do you ever forget where you are for a second

merry: wtf no

pippin: oh

pippin: well this is awkward

merry: are you okay

pippin: idk

eowyn: i wish zac efron was my husband

aragorn: eowyn

eowyn: what

gimli: ,,,,,,honey

arwen: i will fight zac efron

eowyn: i love u more than zac efron

arwen: yay

sam: guYS

merry: whAT

sam: frodo has never seen lotr

pippin: wtfffff

eowyn: ????how

aragorn: but everyone has seen lotr

frodo: omg

diamond: omg lotr is the best

arwen: ahhhhh what even

frodo: i’ve never seen lotr

sam: ?????

aragorn: lmao ive never seen lotr either

frodo: aragorn let’s watch it together

arwen: guys i have a confession

eowyn: what is it

arwen: i am,,,,,,

arwen: eowyn

eowyn: bro me too

eowyn: mostly bc we have the same name and we look exactly alike

merry: same

boromir: legolas annoys me tho

gimli: RT x1100988 ^^^^

gimli: i hate legolas more than i hate myself

pippin: have y’all ever thought about how weird it is that we all a) have the same names as the characters and b) look exactly like them?

eowyn: nah bc viggo mortensen is way hotter than aragorn could ever dream of being

aragorn: tf?

diamond: guys i just listened to billy boyd’s song and i’m S O B B I N G

pippin: i am a witness

eowyn: omg he has the voice of an angel

merry: :(:(:(:(:(

arwen: HOME IS BEHIND

arwen: THE WORLD AHEAD

gimli: stoppp you’re gonna make me cry

gimli: i am a Man ™

gimli: Men ™ don’t cry

sam: i cry when i watch lotr

sam: mostly bc the fact that elijah wood’s hair in lotr is not his actual hair

gimli: well clearly you are not a Man ™

frodo: okay well now i wanna watch this movie

aragorn: same

sam: how about

sam: EVERYONE COMES OVER TONIGHT AND WE ALL WATCH IT TOGETHER

eowyn: omg yes i haven’t seen lotr since like

eowyn: ,,,,,saturday

arwen: it’s sunday

merry: yeah i’m up for a movie night

diamond: yeah me too

pippin: yaY

frodo: okay cool

aragorn: i hope this movie doesn’t suck bc you’re all making it out to be really good

eowyn: bc it IS really good

arwen: eowyn i am going to take a shower if you would like to join me

aragorn: jesus is watching

eowyn: sure arwen lolol

boromir: okay i’ll see you all l8r but rn i am going to do Things with aragorn

merry: god bless thy soul

frodo: sin sin sin

gimli: i’mm crying omg

pippin: ew

merry: sinnnnnnnnnnnnn

boromir: sorry can’t hear you over the Sound of Aragorn

arwen: AHHHHH

pippin: ITS TIME TO STOP

diamond: T R I G G E R E D

gimli: boromir your ChIlDrEn are in this groupchat

arwen: kys

pippin: okay i am bringing snacks tonight

sam: k see you guys later i guess

frodo: bye sammy

sam: im literally five feet away from you jfc

///  
sam: guys you all left after the movie ended right

gimli: yeah

boromir: yep

diamond: yeah i slept at eowyn and arwen’s why

sam: i woke up on the couch and went into the bedroom and frodo and aragorn are both laying in my bed staring at the ceiling and i don’t think either of them slept last night

eowyn: they’re in the lotr estate

gimli: they probably won’t talk for a while

sam: how do i get them out of my bed

sam: i mean frodo can stay but aragorn needs to leave

boromir: ugh can someone pick ary up for me

diamond: i could come pick him up and drop him at your place

diamond: i’m really comfy in eowyn’s bed rn tho

diamond: she made me coffee and everything

merry: damn i wanna stay at her place

eowyn: yes i know i’m gr9 guys

sam: di pls come get him

diamond: okay okay let me finish my coffee first i’m almost done

sam: fine

frodo: hello

boromir: omg it lives

pippin: hi frodo are u okay

 

frodo: no

eowyn: understandable

frodo: the end

frodo: i am deceased

frodo: they were at the harbor and he just left,,,,

frodo: i’m going to commit

pippin: okay

merry: lol okay

eowyn: cool

arwen: ooh nice

boromir: lit

sam: littY

gimli: yay

frodo: i do not need this abuse i am GRIEVING

arwen: i was like this when i watched it for the first time too

frodo: does the pain ever end

pippin: no not really

merry: nope never

 

gimli: guys guys guys omg i almost forgot to tell you

gimli: i have a date tonight

diamond: oOH YES GIMLI

eowyn: omg yayy !!

frodo: omg this is so exciting

sam: omg bless

aragorn: is he cute

aragorn: what’s his name

aragorn: where did he grow up

aragorn: what is his opinion on puppies

gimli: yes

gimli: legolas

gimli: idk

gimli: he loves them

aragorn: okay i give u my blessing

gimli: thanks

sam: how did you meet this nice fellow

gimli: in line at starbucks yesterday

arwen: omg coffee shop theme wedding !!!???

eowyn: YES

aragorn: wAIT I THINK I HAD A CLASS WITH HIM LAST SEMESTER

aragorn: YEAH I DID

aragorn: he’s cool

gimli: yay

aragorn: well kidz it’s gettin pretty late and my bf is cuddled into my neck and i’m pretty sure he’s sleeping

diamond: aw i’m crying

eowyn: ^

diamond: k i‘m getting sleepy friends so i bid you adieu adieu to yieu and yieu and yieu

gimli: nighty night

frodo: gn guys

aragorn: goodnight. boromir is asleep but i’m sure he sends his love

eowyn: goodnight guys, ur the best friends in the world <3

aragorn: damn #friendzoned ://

eowyn: stfu

merry: aw eowyn is getting sentimental

merry: love u ma

eowyn: omg everyone call me that from now on

eowyn: I Am Your Mother

pippin: damn night mama

 

arwen: that’s kinky

merry: do i have permission to call you mama ey

eowyn: Yes ™

merry: damn gn mama ey

frodo: night mama

sam: goodnight ma

gimli: night mom

arwen: this is getting out of hand

eowyn: stfu arwen

eowyn: goodnight my children


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gimli goes on a date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who rose from the fucking dead lmaoo

gimli: guys what should i wear on my date tonight

eowyn: omg wait send some options

sam: yes make sure they’re cute

diamond: there really is no extent to your gayness huh

sam: nope

gimli: oh my

gimli: attachment: 3 images

eowyn: the second one

sam: yeah i agree eowyn

arwen: really i like the first

aragorn: i like the third

gimli: well it looks like we’ve gotten ourselves into quite a pickle

gimli: wait i have an idea

gimli: whoever gets me a venti iced coconut milk mocha macchiato from starbucks and get it to my place first wins and i’ll wear the option they chose

eowyn: i like this game

sam: same

arwen: this is gonna be lit

aragorn: mmhm i’m ready to kill

eowyn: remember kidz

eowyn: mama ey don’t play for fun, she plays to win.

arwen: mmhm okay henny

merry: where even is frodo

aragorn: he’s being the ghost in the group chat

sam: he’s reading all of these texts but not responding

frodo: goddamn it sam i’m drinking my coffee

gimli: you just woke up didn’t you

frodo: ,,,,i’d rather not answer that

eowyn: frodo it is 1:05 pm

pippin: @ frodo why do you do this

gimli: alrighty everyone get ur shoes on and get ready to race !!11!!!!1!!!!1!!!!!2

sam: yess

aragorn: omg i’m ready

arwen: ^

eowyn: get ready to lose bitches

diamond: i hate you all sm

merry: di where is pip

diamond: he’s making me breakfast ;P

frodo: so spoiled

diamond: ikr

pippin: i am here

sam: hiii

diamond: he made me french toast OMG

aragorn: french toast is literally bread toasted in france

diamond: stfu

eowyn: listen arwen while this competition is under way we’re gonna need to pretend that we are not in a relationship bc i am not gonna go easy on you just bc you’re my girlfriend

arwen: agreed

boromir: y’all are weird as fuck

aragorn: ^

aragorn: when is this thing starting

gimli: once all of you are ready

sam: i’m ready

aragorn: same

eowyn: me too

gimli: arwen?

arwen: hold on i’m almost finished with my war paint

frodo: omg

pippin: kys

boromir: oh jesus fucking christ

eowyn: guys she isn’t joking

eowyn: attachment: 3 images

sam: oh my goddddd

gimli: i am deceased

diamond: i hate

pippin: i’m so done rn

frodo: i’m just watching this all play out and i’m s c r e a m i n g

gimli: *internal, external, and eternal screaming*

pippin: ^^^^^

diamond: im yeLLIN

arwen: you can all make fun of me as much as you’d like but can you pls save it for after the competition bc i am ready to WIN

gimli: okay okay

gimli: is everyone ready?

sam: yeppp

aragorn: so ready

eowyn: i was born ready

arwen: i have never been more ready for anything in my entire life. i just temporarily changed my middle name to ready.

gimli: ,,,,k den

gimli: on your mark

gimli: get ready

gimli: set

gimli: GO

boromir: aragorn just ran out the front door so fast it was like in scooby doo when they run away and there’s a cloud in the shape of the person

diamond: accurate

//

eowyn: I WONNNNNNNNN YASSSSSS BITCHEZZZZZZZZZ I TOLD YOUUUUUUU I WOULD WINNNNNNNNN I AM THE BESTTTTTTTTT ™

arwen: bitch

sam: damn

aragorn: what a sore winner goddamn

frodo: so you’re wearing the secong outsit tonight?

gimli: yep

boromir: i can’t believe you guys did this just so he would pick the outfit you wanted him to wear

arwen: don’t judge dramomir

boromir: ???what is a dram

eowyn: the basic unit of money in armenia

aragorn: tf

gimli: well i liked all the outfits so it didn’t matter to me who won AND i got three coffees out of it so it’s cool

diamond: you are a genius

diamond: HEY GUYS WHAT SHOULD I WEAR TMRW

pippin: nothing

diamond: damn ya

diamond: ily

pippin: ly2

merry: y’all stop being so in love mY HEART HURTS

gimli: GUYS IM LEAVING IN 23 MINUTES

gimli: AAAAAAAAA

aragorn: YAY

sam: gimliiiiiii don’t be nervous just be urself u little flower baby angel bean

eowyn: that is an accurate description of gimli

gimli: thank

merry: can i go with u but like come in before u and sit at a separate table so i can spy

gimli: pls do that would make me a whole lot less nervous

merry: yayy

gimli: OKAY IM LEAVING HOLY FUKV

eowyn: YOURE GONNA BE AMAZING

aragorn: LOVE YOU

frodo: GOOD LUCK

sam: BE YOURSELF

arwen: S’AMUSER

aragorn: you’re gonna be fab i just kno it

boromir: go get your man !!!

gimli: AAAAAAAA

\----

gimli: guys omg that was so great

diamond: awwwww kfnfjewf

boromir: im sobbing

aragorn: <333

merry: omgomgomgomg socutesocutesocute

gimli: he’s so cute and nice and he’s quiet and listens to what i say but he also talks about himself so it’s not just me doing all the talking and i’m just shook

merry: okay we all have to meet him now

gimli: oh i told him about all of you

gimli: he says you all sound lovely

pippin: ADD HIM TO THE GROUP CHAT SNKFNEWK

merry: ^^^^

eowyn: yes omg i have to wake arwen up for this

merry: this is exciting

gimli: hold on i gotta ask him if he wants to be in this group chat

frodo: hi friends i’m home now so i can talk

frodo: i had to fuckin drive gimli home and he was so engrossed in this gc that he just stepped out of my car and didn’t even thank me for driving him

sam: gim wtf

gimli: oopsies sorry 

frodo: yeah you bet you are asshat

arwen: i was just sleeping and now i am not bc my girlfriend is an asshole

eowyn: and yet you still climbed into my lap and put your head on my shoulder

diamond: AWWW

gimli: okay he said he wants to be in this

sam: yayayayay

aragorn: woo

arwen: OMGGGG

gimli added legolas to the conversation

legolas: hello all

Aragorn: hello, what are your intentions with my gimli?

legolas: oh

legolas: my intention is to hopefully be his boyfriend maybe ???

gimli: omg wait

gimli: wait was that actually a question

legolas: i mean yeah i guess

gimli: fuck yeah

gimli: date me tf

legolas: cool

diamond: AAAAAAAA

pippin: this is amzing

eowyn: im cryin

boromir: well this was lovely

boromir: but i have a sleeping aragorn on my shoulder

boromir: so im gonna skedaddle

boromir: it was nice kinda meeting you legolas

boromir: aragorn from last semester sends his love

legolas: you too

pippin: i’m gonna go to bed now too,,, bye legolas

merry: ^

eowyn: ^^

arwen: ^^^

gimli: ^^^^

legolas: haha goodnight guys, it was really nice meeting you all


End file.
